This question has been used a lot of times of course,
from people like me, who has a broken heart.
Some people, cry a lot...
isolate themselves from all their friends and anyone
just to feel that loneliness in them.
Be depress even more..
I don't know.
Humans just love to feel the pain and be at it
for a very long time.
Some will even listen to sad,love songs with tears
flowing down their cheeks...sobs..sobs..
Me?
Yes, I am broken hearted.
I am devastated.
I just cried alot of tears.
I'm lonely.
It's not easy to lose someone. Especially when you're
with that person for eight years.
For months, I tried to be insane..suffer heartaches
every now and then..
Yes.
It's sad.
And now I am praying.
"Lord, I know I have a stubborn heart.
Pains are not enough a dose to make me come up
with the right decision.
But pls. I pray..everytime I suffer these pains
and heartaches...
Please, please,please make me more healthy and
prosper me instead.
When I'm feeling so lost and confused,
Clear out my mind and heart..
At this moment, I gotta be smarter.
When I am feeling so sad, frustrated and unloved.
Make me well, Lord.
When I'm feeling so abused and devastated.
Prosper me, Lord.
That's all I got to know.
And that's all I got to ask.
In Jesus name. Amen!
In this crazy, mad, fallen world, you don't need a hero. You only need Jesus!!
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Din, I can totally understand what you are going thru, bec. I went thru something like yr situation. I am the only christ believer in my family of idol worshippers. Dad died when I was 27, mom when I was 32, I was the last child, all others were married and had their own family. After mom died, I was practically cast out by the rest because of my belief. Wasn't included in family gatherings. There were times when my home phone caller ID didn't register a telephone number from any member of my family, for years. I was lonely, very lonely. On top of that, I was so called in love with someone for nearly 10 yrs of my life who didn't give two hoots to me, but he did drain a lot of money out of me. Found out later that he was busy with someone else. (1992) I was devasted. Really devasted. I dumped him like a hot potato and misery and depression followed me, they were my best friends then.
ReplyDeleteOne day, finally worn out from everything, on Nov 18 1995, I prostated myself in front of the Lord and cried my heart out. I told Him, that's it, I give up! I give up my everything to Him, body, mind and soul, everything! to please take care of me. The very next day was the beginning of everything wonderful to happen. After Nov 18, 1995, this verse played continuously in my mind, Seek ye first the kingdom of God .......... I did exactly that. Nothing else was important anymore but Him. I didn't get my very important promotion. I thought Lord, I seeked you and yr kingdom, but why didn't I get this promotion, very important promotion.
Years later, 3 years later, I began to understand all those things that happened was actually for a good reason. I thanked the Lord that He opened my eyes towards that BF, I thanked the Lord that I didn't get the promotion. I thanked the Lord for directing my ways. The blessings that followed became too countless for me to count.
So, what I want to say to you is, keep trusting God and keep seeking after Him and all the other blessings will be added unto you.
Din, I could write more, but I will be taking too much space here *smile* ..... anyway, you'll be in my prayers. Be like the eagle. Be courageous and of good faith. All good things happens at the right time. There is NO mistake where God is concerned. Everything He does is right and only good for us.
Take care child of God, you are precious to Him,
Here is a big big hug to you sister,
Hi Sandra. I know it's you.Thanks for sharing your story with me here on my blog.
ReplyDeleteThe way you do it makes me feel I'm not alone in this world.
(that makes two of you now,I have other friend in here too who's like my guardian angel.Guiding and inspiring me in some ways)
Thank you very much.
Yeah, sometimes depressions, frustrations out of nowhere may attack me every now and then.
But only His words can make me well.
I gotta hold steadfast on my faith for I know these things that happen to me are not of God's doing and everything that heppens...good or bad has a purpose.
Thanks again Sandra.
Pls. keep your prayers with me.
I need it lately.
Din, Hi, hope you feel better today. I have some things to add on how I overcame troubling thoughts, when feelings of depression, sadness, suicide, anything negative, rebuke it in the name of Jesus. Satan loves to remind us of the past, I always remind him of his future and that is he is going to burn in hell.
ReplyDeleteAlso, when u look yourself in the mirror, look where God puts our eyes, in front on the head, that's to look forward, He didn't put it behind so that we look backwards. Look at the clock, it ticks forward, never backwards, the clock ticks into the future, not into the past.
Lastly, I once went to a therapy session when I was really down with marriage problems, and u know what she told me straight to my face, *Stop playing the victim role!* Stop with I have been hurt, I have been done this and that, stop playing the victim* .... Do something to make it better. Now, that was really harsh, those words hit me on my emotions like a nail. Bang! I didn't see it that way but another lady saw it that way. It was harsh how she said it but I appreciated her truthfulness. I made a change and stopped playing the victim role and started playing the victor role.
Oh well, that's all in the past now.
When I get down on my knees to pray about u, this little voice always says *Don't worry, she will be fine* .... I don't seem to feel anxious or something like that when I pray about u to Him. However, when I pray about other lost souls, I do feel a kind of anxiety. Just let u know that u are definitely in GOOD hands, so go forward in life okay.
Take care
Thanks for the nice message Sandra:)i love reading your every reply.Makes me feel good all the time.
ReplyDeleteI am hurt always..and you are right.It's because I always try to live on my past. I think of how that person hurt me.A lot of how's and why's actually. Unconsciously, the scene keeps playing on my mind and then suddenly, unconsciously, my emotion gets affected by it. Then I start to feel the pain again and start hating that person all over again. It's sickening. I know this has become my "cancer".
"Satan loves to remind us of the past, I always remind him of his future and that is he is going to burn in hell. " Yes, thanks for the tip. I'm going to do this everytime that happens.
Everytime some hurting and bad thought come to my mind, I say this too, "I REJECT IT, IN JESUS NAME!!"
It works!
"Look at the clock, it ticks forward, never backwards, the clock ticks into the future, not into the past." ---> yeah, you are right about that. With Jesus, we haev a new life. We are new. So must let go old and barren life that we have and look forward for new things and NEW LIFE!
"When I get down on my knees to pray about u, this little voice always says *Don't worry, she will be fine* .... I don't seem to feel anxious or something like that when I pray about u to Him. However, when I pray about other lost souls, I do feel a kind of anxiety. Just let u know that u are definitely in GOOD hands, so go forward in life okay." --> Thanks for the prayers. and this message.I feel God is really with me and assuring me of His love when I read this part.
Everytime I fail or forget about Him, I have asked Him just to never let me go. That's all I ask from Him and I think He is doing a good job. Because each time I'm depressed, frustrated, devastated and confused, those moments don't seem to last long. The next time, I see myself enjoying life and having a good time. I don't know how it happens. I believe it's Him that's working in me and tells me to be worry-free.
Thanks again Sandra.
You take care too ok?
Din, do you realise that Nov 2 when you wrote this entry and you were crying loads .... could it be pre-menstrual syndrome? Because on Nov 6 you wrote an entry about mensus.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was menstruating, 1 week before my mensus, I used to be very depressed, very prone to crying, very negative thoughts.
Maybe it's the same for you. How about you write a log book, diary of sorts and you record yr feelings.
I did that when I was younger, wrote my feelings out and then I found out that I was depressed the week before my mensus. Thereafter, I could tell myself that my sad feelings were just PMS and that I will soon be better.
The log I created had 2 columns, happy, sad. I just put a stroke next to the days. I did it for a couple of months.
Next month, beginning of the month is the time you have to be prepared to feel sad and cry alot. This time you can pray about it. Yah?!!!
Ohhhh I am so happy for you that next month you are going to be free from tears.